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SpongeBob Star Wars/transcript
Happy Star Wars Day! SpongeBob Star Wars animation intro as well as setting starts in space with dramatic Star Wars tunes. Patchy the Pirate: Hey Kids! It's me, President of the SpongeBob SquarePants Fanclub, Patchy the Pirate! Today I'm here with another SpongeBob SquarePants TV movie! This time, in a complete different adventure! Can you guys guess what it is? Potty the Parrot: unamused. It's Star Wars. Patchy: Potty! Why'd you tell them! It was a test question! Potty: More like a question just to earn you a nickel of pay! Patchy: Hey Kids, hehe, don't mind Potty, he's a real fitther flapper at times. He should just be ignored. Potty: I should say the same for you. Patchy: If you don't mind, Potty, millions of fans want to watch the special instead of listen to your blabber, you feather brain! Potty: If that's true then why did Nickelodeon hire you? Patchy: I'm the special entertainment! Now, roll the cartoon! card accompanied by music. Plankton: Ugh! Another failed attempt! Again! Man Ray: Oh, don't feel sad, Plankton! Here, in my workshop, I built a special personality-inator and I've always liked the amount of pure evil from this pop series I've watched called: Star Wars, and maybe we could succeed if we try their techniques! Plankton: That's a genius idea! Man Ray: 3, 2, 1... huge boom is heard. Darth Ray: Looks like it worked! Although I have my doubts working with a tiny piece of gum. Kylo Plankton: Come on Darth Ray! I'm not gum and I've spent my life in Bikini Bottom and all of my evilest schemes have been miserable failures! Darth Ray: You know, we can rule the universe by forcing everyone on Earth to surrender to our twisted control of evil! Kylo Plankton: You do realize Earth doesn't exist anymore, right? Darth Ray: What? How? Kylo Plankton: You already destroyed it, you simpleton! Darth Ray: Oh, I just lied about destroying Earth. It's still out there. And I will find it! zooms to the Krusty Krab. Squidward: SpongeBob! One order of a Krabby Patty, Kelp Fries, and a Krusty Shake to go! SpongeBob: Comin' right up! Mr. Krabs: Nice Work SpongeBob! I have this strange feeling though. Me eyes are twingin' and me back is tinglin! SpongeBob: What kinda feeling..? Mr. Krabs: I feel like we're being watched, or someone is hunting us down. But nah, probably just in me flimsy brain. SpongeBob: Okay then. Whatever you say, bossman! zooms back to Kylo Plankton Kylo Plankton: There it is, Ray! Earth, and the.. the.. Krusty Krab! BWAHAHAHAH! Give me that anti-gravity gun. Darth Ray: Don't touch that, you fool! Kylo Plankton: at Krusty Krab, shoots. Bam! There we go! Drat! I misfired! The Krusty Krab is floating off into space! Darth Ray: Who cares about a stupid little formula?! What I care about is ruling the world! evilly. Kyle Plankton: Destroying a planet will get you nowhere, you boob! Darth Ray: You'll see! You'll all see...hehehehe. goes back to Krusty Krab. SpongeBob: Mr. Krabs! We're flyin' overboard! Mr. Krabs: Eh, looks like we're in space, boyo! SpongeBob: Look! It's a spacecraft! Mr. Krabs: But not just any spacecraft! flashbacks. Mr. Krabs: flashback. Ah, Eugene, gonna watch Star Wars. Wait, what!? They want to destroy a planet?! That's crazy, I ain't watching this flick! ends. Mr. Krabs: I know what this could mean! If something isn't done, we'll all lose our lives! Our short, wet... Squidward: '''...miserable lives. '''SpongeBob: AH! Well, what should we do? Mr. Krabs: There's only one thing to do! whispers Star Wars! A long time ago, in a galaxy far, far away.... wars intro Narrator: narrates Mr. Krabs: Here! Everyone, take these special clothing. They'll transfer you into Star Wars characters. clothing from secret vault. They'll also immediately transfer you into a Star Wars dimension, and you'll forget about Bikini Bottom unless you take the clothing off. SpongeBob: Oh wow! Neato! on suit. Sponge Skywalker: Now, I am Sponge Skywalker! Laughs Krabs Wan Kenobi: As I said, I am Obi Wan Kenobi, Krabs version! Pearl: Ew, dad. That suit and belt is so 4000 years ago! May I have a more fashionable character? Krabs Wan Kenobi: Sure, honey! You can be...er...off a curtain from a window and hands it to pearl as a dress. ''Princress Leia! ''Krabs pronounces it Layer. Pearl Leia: Thanks. Sandy: Oh Great! I'm a Star Wars rebel! C-SquidPO: Wait! Why am I a robot?! Sponge Skywalker: You're a droid! C-SquidPO: Now I remember why I hate Star Wars! R2-Gary: Meow. Sponge Skywalker: Aw, even Gare Bear is a droid! Han Star: And I... am Han Star! Chewflatta: I'm Chewflatta whispers. A.K.A Flats. Sponge Skywalker: Well, we're basically floating into outer space and I bet Darth Ray and the Galactic Empire are probably planning something diabolical! Krabs Wan Kenobi: We should probably head to Tatooine so I can train you, Skywalker how to fight with Yoda and how to be a talented Jedi. C-SquidPO: But how will we get there? Han Star: SquidPO, have you really not watched any of the Star Wars films? C-SquidPO: No! Star Wars is for those who choose to be the uncultured bags of society! Han Star: Ah, I thought so. What you didn't know that I own a great grand spacecraft called "The Millennium Falcon." Star presses remote control and Millennium Falcon suddenly appears. Han Star: Anyone care for a ride to Tatooine? Sponge Skywalker: Yes. Krabs Wan Kenobi: Yes. C-SquidPO: No. Han Star: Well too bad droid Squid! You're going with us! C-SquidPO: What?! Krabs Wan Kenobi: To the ship! walks onboard the massive vehicle. Han Star: Alright, Chewy, initiate launch sequence. Chewflatta: growls. of engines starting can be heard. They zoom off at hyper-speed. Sponge Skywalker: So, where are we off to? Han Star: Good ol' Tatooine! Krabs Wan Kenobi: Then young Sponge, I'll teach you a few tricks up my sleeve! You'll become an excellent rebel fighter! Han Star: There it is! The Desert planet of Tatooine! Mysterious music plays. ♪ Krabs Wan Kenobi: Here we are. Here's the plan. Solo, head to headquarters and see what your mission is. Skywalker, come with me. C-SquidPO & R2-Gary, follow me! Sandy: I'll head to headquarters with Han too. R2-Gary: Meow. Krabs Wan Kenobi: Here Lad! at Sponge Skywalker. Take this. lightsaber out of bag and gives it to him. Sponge Skywalker: Oh yay! Our very own lightsabers! Skywalker swings around lightsaber and slices Han Star's head off. His head regrows. Han Star: Yeah, I have something even better. A laser gun! Laser Gun. Krabs Wan Kenobi: Anyway, everyone to your stations! zooms to Krabs Wan Kenobi's hut. Krabs Wan Kenobi: So yeah Sponge! Some people know me as K. Kenobay which is a nickname. Some people also call me Ben Kenobi. Sponge Skywalker: Interesting! Krabs Wan Kenobi: Anyways, I'd like you to meet my good master and friend, Yoda. Yoda. Yoda, I'd like you to meet my good pal, Sponge Skywalker. Yoda: Well, you look a bit short and Spongey, don't you young fella? Sponge Skywalker: Well I wouldn't be talking if I were you as you're not any taller. Yoda: Good point. Sponge Skywalker:'' 'Laughs. '''Yoda: I've been alive for 900 consecutive years, kid. Way longer than you, or what you ever will be. Krabs Wan Kenobi: shouts. Enough! Yoda, be a kind dear and show this kind-hearted Sponge how to be a warrior of the Jedi! Yoda: It takes a lot of practice, you see.... Krabs Wan Kenobi: Indeed! Also, don't mind that Squid guy over there! C-SquidPO: Uh, do I know you? Krabs Wan Kenobi: Uh.. yes? Yoda: at Sponge Skywalker. Have you ever used a Lightsaber before, lad? Sponge Skywalker: No, I just use sticks before. Yoda: at his own posture. This is the posture when you hold one, be careful with it, it's a weapon. Use it on the enemy, and be careful not to accidentally swing it on yourself. The surface of it is scorching hot and it will burn terribly like hot sauce on your tongue! Sponge Skywalker: Interesting observation! Yoda: Now, young squire! The importance of being a Jedi is not just lightsabers, it's techniques. Sponge Skywalker: It is? Yoda:' Yes! It indeed is! Sponge Skywalker: Oh okay! Yoda: Here! telescope. Sponge Skywalker: Oh, I can see space! Yoda: Of course you can! It's a telescope! Sponge Skywalker: I can see the moon, the stars, the two suns on Tatooine which is a unique planet, and a- a... oh my! What's that! Yoda: through telescope Oh! That's a Star Destroyer! Better notify the rebellion immediately. out walkie-talkie. Roger! Commander, there's a huge Star ship that can potentially destroy and cause havoc on your planet. Please notify your agents to look further into this. Hans: Got it. transitions to Han Star with Sandy. Sandy: So, what's the plan when we get there? Han Star: Don't worry, our major will do all the explaining. I'll do all the driving. winks. Also, you can call me Han Solo if you want. Star lands the spacecraft smoothly on the airstrip and everyone gets out and walks towards the entrance. Han Star: Greetings Major! Hans: Yes, I am a hand but I'm major. If you haven't already noticed, for your convenience, Darth Ray and his Empire are constructing a dangerous weapon. Han Star: What's the weapon called? Hans: The Name is just pure evil, it hurts my own tongue! It's, the Death Star! Han Star: Woah! Hans: So, whispers. Here's the plan! Han, you and Chewflatta should head on the millennium falcon and retrieve the plans. They're crucial s we can put a stop to their diabolical actions before it's too late! Sandy, you can go to Mos Eisley and relax before your next mission. Sounds good? Han & Sandy: Yep! growls. transfers to Jabba-the Hutt's lair. Jabba the Hutt: to his bounty hunters. Alright men! Look! I'm not sure if you didn't already know, a smuggler and Rebel by the name of Han Solo failed to repay the cargo I lost! Plus, I've heard he's trying to stop the Galactic from unleashing their master plan! And I'm a fan of 'em! Therefore, I have some punishment in store for him, I want you all to hunt him down! Bounty Hunter #1: Where is he exactly? Jabba the Hutt: Why I don't know! He could be anywhere! Just capture him! Otherwise, he'll ruin the Galactic's plans and I need revenge on him for losing my goods! Plus, if the Galactic falls, the Hutt Clan and council falls! So find him and bring him back! Also, according to his ID profile, he's actually "Han Solo Star," meaning "Solo" as a middle name. Eh, what's the difference? Just find him! Bounty Hunters: You got it! Boba Fett: Actually, I've seen Han! I saw him at the Mos Eisley Spaceport, I think he was heading towards the Millennium Falcon! Jabba the Hutt: Well? Go follow him! Don't just sit around like a pig! You all have legs! So go, my men! Go find him! Don't sit around like blobs!at the lair door and the men exit. looks down and realizes he is a blob. transfers to the Death Star Kylo Plankton: Darth Ray! Do you think Emperor Palpabubble will agree with the plans? Darth Ray: Sure he will. He's just a dirty looking bubble. I can easily pop him if he doesn't. Kylo Plankton: Good point. However, the Rebel alliance is still strong and sources tell us that they're coming after us! Darth Ray: Eh, nothing to worry about really. I received a call from an old friend of mine, Jabba, he said he sent troops down below in Tatooine to search the perimeter and Mos Eisley for Han Solo. Kylo Plankton: Well, they're looking in the wrong place you moron! He's already left the spaceport in Mos Eisley! Darth Ray: And.. nobody's gonna stop him?! Kylo Plankton: Well, it's a good thing I attached a tractor beam to the Death Star for defense against enemy spacecrafts. However, I still have to troubleshoot it first! Darth Ray: Ugh. First let's consult, Palpabubble, then we'll discuss the future plans, m'kay? Kylo Plankton: Fine! zooms back to Kenobi's Hutt. Yoda: Now, Sponge, you can be a real Jedi! Sponge Skywalker: Great! Did I graduate from training camp now? Yoda: Not quite. There's one thing I forgot to explain and tell you. Sponge Skywalker: What's that? Yoda: It's, "the force!" Sponge Skywalker: What's "the force!"? Yoda: Sonny boy, have you ever heard of the phrase, "may the force be with you?" giggling. Sponge Skywalker: Yeah, I've heard it on a cereal commercial, but never really thought about what it meant. Yoda: The force can be dangerous, but useful at times. Sponge Skywalker: '''With great power comes great responsibility! '''Yoda: '''Wrong franchise, dope! '''Sponge Skywalker: But what does it do? Yoda: force to life Sponge I can lift you up and place you down. Wanna know why? Sponge Skywalker: Woah, that's so weird! How and why? Yoda: I have an answer that answers all of your miniature questions that need answers. The answer is; The force! Every Jedi has some force, and I'm full of force. Darth Ray also has access to the force which can be risky if you go to battle against him. So be careful! Sushi isn't on the menu today, Spongey Boy! Krabs Wan Kenobi: Sorry to intervene, but please only use the force if it's absolutely needed. Otherwise, it'd violate the Jedi force ownership policy. Sponge Skywalker: Oh, I see. Krabs Wan Kenobi: Never use it for anything bad! Sponge Skywalker: '''Aw, so I can't use it to flip patties? '''Krabs Wan Kenobi: and nudges forward. I'm being serious! Sponge Skywalker: down. Okay, okay! Geez, calm down old man! I was only joking! Krabs Wan Kenobi: I'm not old! Sponge & Yoda: Actually.., you kinda are. Krabs Wan Kenobi: Oh whatever! Nevermind that! Sponge, the day is almost over and I'm not lettin' ye stay here in me Hutt. No space, and I don't let guests stay for free. I'm a little low on cash these days and my little hoedown restaurant in Mos Eisley is earning me the last few pennies! You can check it out though now if you'd like! It's usually active in the evening. Sponge Skywalker: Thanks for the offer but I'm staying with Uncle Owen as you perhaps might know. He's strict on the times I have to head home. I guess I can ask him if we can go tonight but I can't make any promises. Krabs Wan Kenobi: Where'd ya live, laddy? Maybe I can walk with ye and ask? Sponge Skywalker: Um, not far. About a 5-minute walk. Or hobble in your case. Laughs. Krabs Wan Kenobi: C'mon then! Let's go! Yoda: Hmm, should I tag along? Krabs Wan Kenobi: Sure. Why not? Patchy: Hey, you kids enjoyin' the special? I locked that pipsqueak Potty in a cage over there! Potty: Who ya calling Pipsqueak, you old bag of bones! Patchy: Kids, don't mind Potty. He doesn't deserve any attention. Just a feathery rat with wings. Potty: You shouldn't call me what your gramma calls you! Patchy: Now, lemme tell me SpongeBob tale. He's havin' a relaxin' evenin' with Uncle Owen. This reminds me of a time I was with my Aunt Frank, and we were eatin' some carrot chips and~ Potty: Oh, Patchy, roll, the film already! These kids have better lives than you! Patchy: Oh fine! Onto the cartoon! transitions to Uncle Owen's hut. Uncle Owen: You can go but promise not to be too disruptive. I can't remember the last time I let you go out and you didn't '''cause an explosion. Go on. '''Sponge Skywalker: Yay! Uncle Owen: Oh, how about I go with you guys? Sponge Skywalker: unamused. Aw! Why'd you have to ruin everything! Uncle Owen: I have to go to make sure you don't run into trouble, young spongey-man! Sponge Skywalker: Oh whatever! Uncle Owen: Everyone, let's take this old hover car. gets on amused. Krabs Wan Kenobi: Wow. Never thought modern technology could really be that useful. Uncle Owen: Everyone buckle up! Yoda: Kenobi, it isn't. I'd rather walk barefoot. But I'll hitch a ride as I don't want to get lost. start traveling to Mos Eisley. Uncle Owen: Where do you have planned to go in Mos Eisley? Krabs Wan Kenobi: We're gonna stop by the theatre area. I heard there's gonna be a performance. Uncle Owen: Okay. Sponge Skywalker: It'll be great entertainment so I'm guessing a lot many people are gonna see it! Uncle Owen: Yep, and.. here we are! to a sign. We're now in Mos Eisley. The theatre is right over there so I'll park right here. Krabs Wan Kenobi: Okay, let's go. Yoda: Ah, the nice breeze. It feels so good! Uncle Owen: door. According to this promotional flyer, it says a man called Frenchy will perform. Sandy: Hi guys! Sponge Skywalker: Sandy! I never knew you were gonna show up! Sandy: Yep. Hans the talking hand sent Han Star and Chewflatta to the Death Star to retrieve the plans. starts clapping. Sandy: Oh Great! The show's about to start! French narrator: Greetings fellow Bikini Bottomites! It is me! Frenchy! A.k.a, the French narrator. I will be narrating the performance. Sponge Skywalker: to giggle. I think this will be the best part! French narrator: Let me invite the practical jokers who will both tell the best joke in the history of jokes! Practical jokers together: Why'd the chicken cross the road? Everyone: Why? Practical jokers: To get to the other side! Sponge Skywalker: Boo! That was trash! French narrator: Our next performance is.... Bubbles the dolphin! Bubbles: Yep, bubbles is the name! at crowd. Today, I am one of the most powerful magicians in the world! Right, in my hat hat., will appear some sea bunnies. Hazzzzaaaa! bunnies come flying out. Crowd: of applause is heard. Krabs Wan Kenobi: By the way, if y'all didn't know already, this is my restaurant diner that has a theatre. Sponge Skywalker: Cool. Although it's getting late. Gettin' kinda tired. zooms to Darth Ray who walks into Palpabubble's lair. Darth Ray: Greetings Emperor! Palpabubble: Greetings my companion! What can I do for ya? Darth Ray: Kylo Plankton stated he constructed a tractor beam for us on the Death Star. I also received news that Han Star and Chewflatta are on their way here. Palpabubble: Jabba the Hutt was actually looking for Han. Maybe we'll do him a favor by catching Han and then bring him to Jabba. Darth Ray: The only problem is.. we don't know where Han will land! There are many landing stations. We won't know which one. And.. the tractor beam is malfunctioning, unfortunately so we had to turn it off. Palpabubble: Nevermind that. Just make sure Han doesn't succeed his mission. Darth Ray: 'kay. zooms back to bar. French narrator: And the Italian concertina was our last performance of ze' show. Please exit on the left, merci. goes to the exit and says goodbye to everyone in French. Sponge Skywalker: out door. Thanks frenchy! French narrator: No, Thank you miseur for coming! Krabs Wan Kenobi: You're welcome! By the way, I own the place so git! Sponge Skywalker: points. Hey! Look over there! It's Old Man Jenkins! Old Man Starkins: I ain't Old Man Jenkins, I'm Old Man Starkins! Sponge Skywalker: unamused. Same thing. Uncle Owen: C'mon guys! It's 10:03 PM! How about we all get some shut-eye? Yoda: yawning. Agreed. I honestly don't have time for dilly-dallying! Let's get a move on! Krabs Wan Kenobi: I'm actually gonna walk home with Yoda. Later dogs. Sponge Skywalker: Later bro. transfers to aboard the millennium falcon with Han Star. Han Star: Looks like they're after me. I just received a warning from Hans. Better stay alert, chewy. Chewflatta: growls. Han Star: Ah, there's the Death Star. And we're in luck! The tractor beam seems to be broken, ha ha! I'll land in landing pad 3B-04 and then we shall continue our mission aboard the Death Star. lands the spaceship on the landing pad then gets out with Chewflatta quietly not to disturb or alert the stormtroopers. Han Star: Be careful chewy! We're entering enemy territory! Chewflatta: loudly. enemy heard the growl and starting heading towards Han and a Chewflatta. Han Star: Chewflatta, hide! runs away and Han gets captured. Han Star: Let me go you headless goat! stormtroopers bring him to an empty room, and traps him there. Han Star: shouts. Let me out! You're diabolical mate! Stormtrooper #1: into walkie-talkie. Ray, we've got him. Darth Ray: Excellent! Now, tonight, I shall deliver him personally to old lad Jabba the hutt but for now, I have some important meetings to tend to. Ray out. stormtroopers walk out of the room leaving the door locked. The keys of the room were given to Ray and kept in a secret compartment in the area. Han Star: watch as walkie-talkie. Chewflatta! Chewflatta: to watch. Han Star: whispers. Now, as quiet as you possibly can, please come to capture room 305. But first, you must retrieve the keys. Chewflatta: confusingly. Han Star: The keys are in an underwater compartment full of dark force. Get them, and come to the capture room, and unlock the door. Chewflatta: nods. walks through hallways, through staircases, he avoids a group of stormtroopers discussing important events, and eventually makes it to the tank of water. He heads in slowly. There's a sea monster that confronts him. He has had experiences like this before and knows how to handle it. He throws a hoagie and the monster follows it leaving space for chewie to quickly grab the key and swim out, shut the door and return to Han Star. Chewflatta: key & turns knob. with joy. Han Star: Aw, my chewie! Quickly, let's get the Death Star plans and get outta here! Chewflatta: and follows Star. Han Star: Quickly! This way! both run towards a room with lasers but Han inserts a piece of metal extremely hot that burns the system controls removing all the lasers. Han takes the Death Star plans CD but the alarm sounds. Han Star: Quickly! Back to the ship! run back to the ship until they were confronted by Kylo Plankton. Kylo Plankton: Stop right there! steps on Plankton's leg. Kylo Plankton: screams. MY LEG! Stop, and feel the rays of my lightsaber! grabs Plankton and throws him away in the garbage and then runs away. Kylo Plankton: the trash can. Hey! Han Star: C'mon! ship. With the alarm sounded, anything could happen! and Han get onboard and starts lift-off. Stormtrooper #287: There they are! The rebels are escaping! Stormtrooper #358: Stop the ship. stormtroopers run to try and shoot the canon at the ship but it was too late. Stormtrooper #10,000: Darn it! Han Star: the Millennium Falcon. Hooray! That was lucky! And with the Death Star plans, our mission is done! Chewflatta: with content! Han Star: Uh oh. We'd better put hyper speed. turns up the controls and they're blasted back to Tatooine. Han Star: latch and gets off ship. Ah, that was a close one! Chewflatta: growls. Han Star: Now that's over, let's- Boba Fett: Stop right there! Han Star: Who the heck are you? Bounty Hunters: We are the Bounty Hunters! We were hired by Jabba the Hutt to capture you so you're comin' with us! Han Star: What?! Hunters tie up Han Star and Chewflatta and carry them back to the base. Han Star: watch. Help! transfers to Rebellion headquarters. Hans: Sandy, Han has been captured! We need you and Leia to go rescue him! Also, the Galactic located our base here so we must flee and temporarily relocate to Hoth. Sandy: Okay first! Where's Pearl Leia? Hans: Oh, she's with Kenobi in his hut. Go there, get her and head off to rescues Han! We need the Death Star plans before Jabba destroys them! Sandy: Yes but two people may not be enough! May I take Skywalker? Hans: Eh, why not? Now, hurry! Before it's too late! Sandy: You got it, sir! rushes in a hover craft down and grabs up Kenobi, Leia and Skywalker and immediately flies off. Krabs Wan Kenobi: angrily. So what's the big idea! Sandy: We shall rescue Han! Krabs Wan Kenobi: unamused. Oh, Han is fine! Don't worry about it! He's had years of training, he's a skilled warrior! Plus, he's at the Death Star right now retrieving the plans. Sandy: Uh, that was a while ago. He was captured when landing in Tatooine a few hours ago. Jabba's men took him to the palace in which Jabba lives in. We must rescue him and get the plans! Krabs Wan Kenobi: shocked. Oh gosh! Hurry then! Pearl Leia: Wait, why did you grab me?! Two men and you are enough to rescue Han. Sandy: No, you don't understand. Here's the plan, Kenobi and I will go free Han. Skywalker, you fight off the guards and Leia, you make sure Jabba doesn't know we're in his palace. Sounds good? Pearl Leia: Umm, yeah I guess. Sandy: Alright. propels forward and after a few minutes, they arrive at the palace and creep inside. Sandy: points. There he is! Oh my! They got Chewie too! We've gotta save them! Krabs Wan Kenobi: Everyone got yer weapons? Sponge Skywalker, Pearl Leia, & Sandy: Yep! Skywalker steps out of the shadows and starts charging towards the guards. While the guards were distracted, Sandy and Kenobi crept quietly and melted the metal bars that held Han and Chewie in place using a lightsaber. Then Jabba hears the noise from another room and sneaks to see what's happening. He sneaks behind Sandy and Kenobi about to strike but then, something remarkable happens. Pearl Leia: Guys, look out! Behind you! Jabba swings an arm at them, it's in slow-motion. Then Pearl jumps from behind and grabs Jabba in the neck. Jabba the-Hutt: Who dares touch me?! Pearl Leia: Leave my friends alone! Jabba the-Hutt: struggling. You don't understand! Han used to work for me and was supposed to delivered some of my goods. He dropped them in space and now, to punish him, I must sentence him to death along with the Wookiee over to his right. Pearl Leia: Oh no you won't! Not unless I put you to death first! Jabba the-Hutt: struggles. Never! Let me go you blubbering porpoise! Sandy: Yeah Pearl! Knock his head in! Jabba the-Hutt: Quiet beaver! has a rope in her pocket and raps it around Jabba's neck, then tightens it, choking and suffocating him until she strangled him to death. Jabba the-Hutt: last words. Hope! get Han and Chewie free and run outside into the vehicle. They fly off leaving the guards behind in defeat. Sponge Skywalker: Aw, welcome back Han! Han Star: No time for the welcome wagon! We need to deliver these plans immediately to headquarters! Chewie: in agreement. Sandy: Uh.. Han. Han Star: Yes? Sandy: We're gonna have to travel to Hoth. You do know that, right? Han Star: No. Wait, what for? Why? Sandy: Headquarters got temporarily relocated due to the Galactic locating HQ. We had to flee to prevent any conflicts at the base which could cause even more damage! Han Star: Yeah. Alright, let's take the Millennium Falcon then to Hoth. Sandy: So, Where is the Millennium Falcon exactly? Han Star: Oh, sorry to break this to you but- we landed in the middle of nowhere and we got kidnapped instantly so we don't remember the exact location. Sandy: Oh, then we can just use the MF tracker. According to it, the Falcon is right over there. points. It's buried though. We all have to dig it up, and head to Hoth. gets a shovel and starts digging the spacecraft out of the hot sand. Han Star: WoW. She's still ready to fly! Everyone get onboard! Sponge Skywalker: Aye aye! Captain! Han Star: We're goin' in hyper-speed. Everyone buckle up! break. Patchy: Oh hey kids! Me and Potty were just havin' a saber duel! Hehe! Potty's strings and Potty falls on the ground. The only thing about Hoth is.. that it houses.. the.. the.. THE... Abominable snow mollusk! Potty: Yeah, I wish that monster could come and eat you. Patchy: INFERNAL BIRD! Shut your yaps, or I'm gonna have me some chicken wings! Potty: Good thing I'm not a chicken, old man! Patchy: WELL ATLEAST I ACCEPT MY AGE!!! Potty: Yeah I thought so. Patchy: Well....erg... at least I'm better than you at chess! Nobody can beat a middle-aged man dressed up like a pirate in a fair game 'o chess! Potty: Hm...really? I'll show you up, old man! Patchy: Well, you guess what? I don't have a chess board, and you don't have fingers! Potty: Let's play tic-tac-toe, OLD MAN! Patchy: '''STOP SAYIN' THAT!!! '''Patchy: Tick-tac plays. Potty: Toe! the game. Patchy: Oh please? That ain't fair! Let's play again., and I'll win this time! French narrator: card. Four hundred pathetic games later.... Potty: Another win for me, hehe. grunts. Patchy: Eh, why don't you kids continue watching the special while I show this cantankerous canary what I'm made of! hehe. Han Star: There it is guys.... Hoth! Home of the abominable snow mollusk! Krabs Wan Kenobi: I was afraid 'a that. Sponge Skywalker: Wait a second! Where's Squidward and Gary? Err.. I meant C-SquidPO & R2-Gary?! Krabs Wan Kenobi: Oh don't worry. Yoda 'ill take care of 'em. transitions to Yoda. Yoda: I'll never take care you! C-SquidPO: Why? Cause you're scared? Yoda: No! Yoda was bubbling and faffing with C-SquidPO, a stormtrooper sneaks in and steals R2-Gary unnoticed. But when the engines start and make a loud noise, Yoda realizes. He tries to follow them and catch them but they get away. Yoda: Aw, look what you've done! C-SquidPO: Oh I've done nothing! You were the one who talks too much, blabbermouth! Zip it, zippee! Yoda: Eh, you're no use either! I'm going away, so long piece of junk! C-SquidPO: See ya later, you stupid green bag of bones! transition back to the icy planet of Hoth and Skywalker and his friends step out of the spacecraft and wander through the snow in a blizzard.... Sponge Skywalker: 'This isn't lookin' too good, guys! '''Krabs Wan Kenobi: '''Yer right! ''they hear a familiar sound, coming from a massive cave right next to them. '''Krabs Wan Kenobi: grin. I know that sound anywhere! It can only mean one thing! Han Star: The new nachos came out from the Sea Chicken Shack?! Krabs Wan Kenobi: No! Get a brain, Han! Now I remember why should've given the role of "Han Solo" to SpongeBob! Nevermind, anyway. It can only mean one thing.. the abominable snow mollusk! hand reaches out and grabs Sponge Skywalker. Krabs Wan Kenobi: MEE BOYOOO!!! I'm comin' for ya, Sponge Walk! Sponge Skywalker cave: It's Skywalker, sir. Krabs Wan Kenobi: What ever! slices through the monsters arm, and Sponge Skywalker sprays ketchup all over where the arm was chopped. The monster falls on the ground, trying to reconnect it's arm. Krabs Wan Kenobi: C'mon, let's go boy. all walk off, away from the cave. WIPE ' ''of Hoth base, slowly zooming in on it. '''Krabs Wan Kenobi: '''So what's the plan, Pearly? '''Pearl Leia: '''How did I get here? '''Krabs Wan Kenobi: Plot convenience! Pearl Leia: Well anyways, we have to destroy the empire! Any ideas, Sponge? Sponge Skywalker: Um...let's see...did you ask nicely? Pearl Leia: Anyways, I think we should~ is interuppted by a phone call. Pearl Leia: Hold on, I should take this. noise between Leia and the caller. Pearl Leia: Oh, it's this guy called...um...Lob...oh? Han Star: I know him from college! Everyone: You went to college? Kylo Plankton Probe Droid: I WENT TO COLLEGE!!! Sponge Skywalker: What wuzzat!? Kylo Plankton: Nothin'! sound, and the droid self-destructs. Han Star: Anyways, let's go see Lobsto! WIPE Patchy: Oh, hey kids! I'm just showin' Potty here me spaceship! Potty: Or at least his sad attempt at building one. Patchy: Someone named Potty has no right to insult anything! Potty: A sad middle aged man who names a parrot Potty has no right to say that someone has no right to insult someone. Patchy: Ugh, just look at me model Falcon! I made it me self outta toothpaste and toothpicks! Potty: Used toothpicks? Patchy: I spared no expense this time, Potty. Of course they're used! Potty: Yeah that's what I figured. Patchy: You'll never guess what I used to paint it! Potty: You're right. Silence Patchy: Just roll the film. WIPE Han Star: Hey, buddy! Lobsto: Heya! and Lobsto chest bump Lobsto: Hey, Han. I've got something to show you. Han Star: OK both go through some ominous looking doors. Sponge Skywalker: There's some pretty nice stuff here in cloud city. Krabs Wan Kenobi: Cut the exposition, boyo. I sense somethin's off here. Sponge Skywalker: Is it your fly? Krabs Wan Kenobi: No! I feel the presence of...the Empire. Sponge Skywalker: What's an Empire? Krabs Wan Kenobi: The Empire is a dastardly group heck-bent on destroying the galaxy to re-shape in in their own image. Sponge Skywalker: That's not very~ Han Star inside room: '''Ahhhh! '''Sponge Skywalker: Flappin' flounders! What's that? bursts into the room where Han and Lobsto are. Kylo Plankton: 'Lower him into the chocolate! '''Han Star ''lowered into the chocolate vat: AHHHHhh!! NOOO!!! is completely submerged in chocolate, and when he is risen, he is completely frozen in it. Darth Ray: Now nobody lays in our way! Sponge Skywalker: Except us! Darth Ray: Ah yes, thanks for pointing that out! Ray whips out his saber and tackles Sponge. Sponge Skywalker: Not so fast! out Lightsaber. both begin hacking and slashing at eachother, until SpongeBob is just barely standing on the edge of the vat of chocolate. Darth Ray: Sponge, I'm not your father! Sponge Skywalker: NOOOOO!!! Ray rears back and chops Sponge's hand off. Sponge Skywalker: AHHHHHHHHH!!! grows another arm, and it pops right back. Sponge Skywalker: laughs ''Oh yeah. '''Darth Ray:' AUGH! SpongeBob out of the room, sending him falling from the sky. ''See ya next fall! Bwoohahahahaha! '''Sponge Skywalker:' AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH breathes AHHHHHHHHHH!!!! ship flies under Sponge and catches him out of the air. '' ''slithers into the inside of the ship. Sponge Skywalker: Squid! Ya did it! C-SquidPO: Gary made me do it. R2-Gary: Meow. SpongeBob: Let's go save our friends! transitions to Darth Ray cornering his friends. Darth Ray: I'm gonna enjoy ripping you all to shreds one by one! Kylo Plankton: For once YOU'LL be the ones to be crushed under defeat! rams through the wall and crushes Kylo Plankton. Kylo Plankton: MY LEG!!! Darth Ray: No matter! I'll still destroy ever last one of you! Skywalker leaps out of the ship and chops Ray's head off. Darth Ray: Fools. and gang run out of Cloud City, with Lobsto carrying Han behind. TRANSITION Patchy: Wow, kids! They sure on a rivetting adventure, eh? Potty: Seriously old man!? The writers couldn't even do the right names. Patchy: It's called creativity, Potty. Potty: That would be like me calling you...well...pirate guy. Patchy: What a splendid idea, Potty! Potty: Kill me now. Patchy: Now c'mon, Potty! Is that what you wanna show the kids? Potty: Well you're showing them a lost eye, leg, and hand. Carelessness. Patchy: I only lost me eye because of the incident with the napkin. Me and Ronald don't talk anymore. Potty: Way'ta be vague. Patchy: 'SHHH! Now, let's open some fan-mail, shall we? ''grabs a letter, and when he opens it, a bomb pops out. '''Patchy: I SAID WE WEREN'T DOIN' THIS GAG!!! bomb explodes, creating an explosion transition. Sponge Skywalker: We need a way to free Han! in his chocolate shell, begins wiggling, until it is revealed that he's eating through the chocolate. Sponge Skywalker: Well that's one less thing to worry about. Now, what about Emperor Palpabubble and the Death Star? Krabs Wan Kenobi: You got a pencil? Sponge Skywalker: Yeah? Krabs Wan Kenobi: ''up chest like a...chest. A bubble flies out. He pops bubble. We give Bubble what 'fer! '''Sponge Skywalker:' And the Death Star? Krabs Wan Kenobi: I've heard that there's a flaw built into it. When it's shot... Sponge Skywalker: KABOOOOM!!! Krabs Wan Kenobi: Right you are, bucky. Sponge Skywalker: Well what are we waitin' for? TRANSITION is flying in a ship, headed towards the Death Star. Krabs Wan Kenobi: Now, I just wanna tell ya this now, boyo. If I never see you again... Sponge Skywalker: Yes, Kenobi? Krabs Wan Kenobi: You were the best apprentice I ever had. Sponge Skywalker: Thanks Kra~ tractor beam, which looks like a tractor, grabs SpongeBob out of the ship and drags him into the Death Star. Sponge Skywalker: Hello? Anybody here? Emperor Palpabubble: Hehehehe, I've driven you right into my trap, SpongeBoy! Sponge Skywalker: Make that SpongeMan, man! I mean...uh...dude...bro?' '''No matter the formalities! I'm here to save the universe and...writing on arm.'' VANQUISH YOU ONCE AND FOR ALL!!! starts running up to Bubble, when suddenly Darth takes a stab at him, jumping from the shadows. Sponge Skywalker: Oof! What the flotsam!? and Darth start battling, with it looking like Darth is gonna win, when all of a sudden, Sponge steps on Kylo Plankton, and a drop of him gets flung into Darth's eye, causing him to trip, and stumble, laying in front of Palpabubble. Emperor Palpabubble: You insepid fool! Must I do everything myself!? hovers up and begins shocking Sponge, and SpongeBob slowly starts pushing it backwards using the force until is touches Bubble, immediately killing him. Sponge Skywalker: lightsaber at Darth. Sorry to burst your bubble, but you've been defeated! Skywalker sees a ship pull up out the window, so he slices the window with his saber, and jumps into the ship. Darth Ray: Shrimp. see the ship fly towards us until zooming out while the Death Star is blowing up. to award ceremony. Pearl Leia: I dub thee heroes of bravery and honor! Chewflatta: then hits himself in the stomach, and a Krabby Patty comes flying out of his mouth. ''I'VE BEEN TRYING TO TELL YOU GUYS THAT I WAS CHOKING!!! '''Sponge Skywalker:' You should work on your pronunciation. Chewflatta: Maybe you should work on your face! punches SpongeBob in the face, knocking off his costume. Everyone starts fighting, until everyone's costume it off. SpongeBob: What just happened? Mr. Krabs: Something deep, boyo, something deep. ROLLS Category:Episode transcripts Category:Transcripts Category:Golfpecks256 Category:2018